I started playing Skyrim. This was a decision that I came to after I realized that Steam had been hacked, and while Gabe assured me that everything was going to be okay, I didn’t want money hanging around in my Steam wallet.
None of this makes sense from an Information Security standpoint.
But now there is a total of zero Steambux Spacedollars in my wallet, and Skyrim ended up costing me about $20 out of this month’s paycheck. It was full price, but I had $40 that I paid to Steam about four months ago that wasn’t doing anything.
I don’t know why I did it. I didn’t like Oblivion. I know, sacrilege. But then, due to the amazing power of groupthink and Reddit, I decided to bite the bullet.
It is a very large and snow covered bullet and I love it.
There are many reviews of Skyrim. This is not one of them.
I’m here to tell you a story.
This is the story of Thalia and Jewel.
Thalia finally saved enough money to buy a horse. She had just made her way to Whiterun and earned the Jarl’s favor by dispatching a few bandits here and there.
With the bounty monies firmly in hand, she visited the stables. When she left, she had a seven year old warhorse that she named, “Jewel.”
She loved that horse. For days they would travel from farms, to breweries, to small riverside villages, to snow capped monasteries, to bandit dens on the tundra, and to nearly all parts of Skyrim.
She was careful, always dismounting a good distance away so that Jewel wouldn’t be involved in the fighting.
Always, after Thalia had finished her silent and bloody work, Jewel would be there waiting for her. Even if Thalia fast traveled to another city, Jewel would be there; waiting at the gates for her.
Thalia and Jewel were on a forest path when they came upon an abandoned hut. Thalia dismounted and upon further investigation, she found that it was a former alchemist’s hut, filled with all sorts of ingredients and recipes.
Upon exiting the hut, she and Jewel were beset by wolves. Thalia immediately pulled IceBite, her frost enchanted dagger. Jewel engaged one of the wolves—
And then promptly ascended into the upper atmosphere at great speed.
Thalia finished off the other two wolves, and then waited.
Suddenly, from the sky, Jewel descended at great speed, not falling, but simply returning to earth, landing on all four hooves as if nothing had happened.
Thalia’s heart beat twice.
Jewel howled one last time, fell over and died. Shortly afterward, a wolf fell from the heavens and died in the same mysterious manner.
Thalia never bought another horse.