Lots of Monkeys

Those of you not interested in console gaming, specifically the Xbox, just skip reading.

I don’t know when the Xbox became my system of choice. Maybe it was the hard drive. Maybe it was the integrated online component and Xbox Live. Maybe it was the fact that it could kill small children under its massive weight. Regardless, I’ve found an interesting future application for the xbox–video conferencing. The nice part about Xbox video conferencing would be the fact that it supports 5 people at once. That, and the fact that you can rumble another participant’s controller remotely.

Absolutely, positively no comment whatsoever.

It looks like a great app, and I’m having a good time leaving voice mail messages for my friends on Xbox Live that never get answered.

The only thing I’m worried about so far are the rumors of an Xbox 2 release in 2005. This would mean that they have only kept their console out for 4 years. Normally, console “life” is 5 years. This is enough time for you to recoup costs of developing the console through sales and games. However, the xbox was released in 2001.

First a look at the competition. The PS3 is currently rumored at having a “sometime in 2006” release date. I’d like to note that the PS2, released in 2000, is still outselling all other consoles, and after the recent price drop, sales have doubled. There are already 30 million PlayStation 2 consoles in North America. And sales are still good. Comparatively, there are 14 million Xbox consoles in North America.

If the rumors are true, MS is planning on cutting the life of their current console short in order to hit the market before Sony brings their 1600 pound gorilla to the US Playground. However, this “first to market” approach didn’t work for SEGA’s DreamCast console. Sony’s marketing and existing grip on the American market is astounding. The DreamCast, despite good hardware and a slew of great games, failed commercially. SEGA now makes games for all of the other consoles, having pulled out of the hardware business altogether.

I’d hate to see the same thing happen to the Xbox.

When I go to the grocery store, and I’m purchasing food that’s going to expire on the day that I was born.

It starts as if hair is coming loose from your ponytail. For a few moments, it’s like someone is gently tugging at individual hairs on your head. Not enough to pull something out, but just enough for you to feel it. You get this vague sensation of something wrong, so you reach your hand back to check.

There’s a quick flutter of opaque wings, and then you turn around to find out that it’s a cicada.

Number of cicadas removed from my person this season: 5
Number removed from my hair: 3

I managed to get on the bus with nobody telling me anything. Maybe they all thought it was a hair ornament. Eventually, it clambered onto my backpack enough for me to grab it by the wings and drop it out a window.

So, we’re all having dinner, right? It’s a nice spread, we’re eating at an actual dinner table for once. There’s even a floral centerpiece. Gold rim chargers, even.

A lot of my friends are there, and then Sarah says, “Wow, you can use a DreamCast as a linux print server?” There’s a loud crack and a puff of smoke. Then a low polygon count 6-inch model of Martha stewart appears on the dining room table, wearing a white jumpsuit with black stripes with the letters, “T,” and “F” embossed to the left and right of the zip up jacket.

We scream. Because we all know she’s Satan.

. . .

So then I wake up, Doctor. What do you think this means?

Seriously, forget about all the Atkins, South Beach, whatever you may have diets out there, there’s something to be said about getting off of that couch. Which is why it’s entertaining for me to see a website about weight loss through Dance Dance Revolution.

Of course, I’m more a Pump It Up fan, than a Dance Dance Revolution fan. It’s just more fun and a little more intuitive.