Done.
Well, not so much attack as generally annoy.
I really don’t have anything else to say. The article is genuinely entertaining on its own.
I’m past the twenty-eight thousand word mark. This puts me somewhat behind. However, I feel that the thanksgiving holiday will give me ample opportunities to “catch up.” In fact, if I go for four thousand words a day, I could conceivably be finished in just about five days. Something to hope for, I guess.
And yes, my novel is about giant robots. No, it did not really happen.
Also, you’ll notice that there are two very subtle changes to the website. I hope you enjoy both of them.
The Ad slogan generator. Too much fun to pass up.
Proof once again that everything is funnier with monkeys.
I work in retail for four hours a week. This weekend marked the unofficial start of the holiday season.
A matter of trust Customer 1: So, do you know if this copy of MS Train Simulator has the new engines in it?
Me: Hrm. I’m not exactly a big fan of those types of games, but you can look at the manual.Ten minutes later. . .
Customer 1: This doesn’t say anything. Do you know if this has the two new engines or not?
Me: I’m sorry sir, I don’t really know anything about–Customer 1 pounds on the counter. He starts to cry.
Customer 1 (Sobbing): I WISH THAT THEY WOULDN’T DO UNFAIR THINGS LIKE THIS!! I JUST WISH THERE WAS SOMEBODY I COULD TRUST!!Beat.
Me: Well sir, it is Microsoft.
Me (Inner Dialogue): Heh, that was pretty funny–Oh crap. I should just shut up.You sure enjoy that word Customer 2 (emphatically): This store sucks.
Me: I’m sorry about the wait ma’am, but–
Customer 2: This store wouldn’t suck so much if the people behind the registers didn’t suck.
Me: Excuse me?
Customer 2: This line sucks, your store sucks, your registers suck, and your people behind the counter suck.Customer 2 then goes on to wait twenty minutes in line to buy something from our store–something, that will undoubtedly suck.
I think the reason I have a retail job is to remind me just how good my other job is. I don’t know if I’d be able to do it forty hours a week. No wonder my coworkers all seem bitter. I’m rather flattered that Customer 2 thought it was my store, though.
——
Point of clarification: Yes, these conversations actually occurred. I only wish I were exaggerating them.