Lots of Monkeys

So, they’re not “French” fries or “French” toast anymore. This is to show support for the United States. I say, why stop there? They still have a salad dressing and an onion soup. We should strive to eliminate all non-supportive nations from our language.

Let’s start with the Chinese, they oppose the war.

Freedom Chicken Salad. Freedom Finger Traps. Freedom Water Torture. Freedom Fire Drills.

The possibilities are endless, because there are a lot of countries that don’t support this war for one reason or another.

It’s a good thing that the Brits support this war, but then again, “Spotted Dick” should be renamed anyway.

If you can call Jury Duty, “work.” All in all, I got through relatively unscathed. Got two hours off for lunch.

Visited the NGA, saw Rodin’s The Thinker, Degas’s Before the Ballet.

Sum total of hours spent in DC Courthouse: 5

     “Parting gifts,” we joked.
     In my head, thanks for playing, not so much a joke because it wasn’t funny. We had dated for two years, and now we were at the end of the relationship.
     Those two years had been “Perfect.” We got along great, had parallel goals. We even wanted the same number of children. I believed that I was going to marry her.
     Strange how things work out.
     We decided that we would both take the high road. We had two good years, and now the time had come to put all that aside and get on with our lives. We just weren’t meant to be.
     So now, parting gifts.
     I got her a CD player for her car.
     She got me a PlayStation.
     Our “ceremony” was surreal, emotionless. We were never good at revealing our emotions. Our courting period consisted mainly of messages sent to each other over the university’s mainframe. Eventually, our shyness in real life dissolved as we grew to know each other through the awkward, arcane syntax of CMS. Every night, on monochrome screens we would talk about everything, nothing.

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     In a not so awkward moment in my dorm’s study room, we finally revealed how we felt for one another. After that, we spent all of our free time together.
     Then, a year later, in a wonderful colliding of worlds, I found out that she was a Jehovah’s Witness. I wasn’t allowed to date her. We continued seeing each other. An illicit affair, continued despite the fact that her father forbade it.
     Another year passed and finally, there was a reckoning. Either I become a Witness and study with them, or she had to leave. She loved me, she said, but she couldn’t leave her family. Filial piety, after all, is a difficult cross to bear.
     Of course, I agreed with her. It was the only logical thing to do. My own sense of filial piety made me nod my head and tell her that it was the right thing to do. Her family was more important than our happiness together. It was simple.
     We cried.
     In retrospect, things were not so simple. What if I had studied and become a Witness? What if she had continued to date me in spite of her father’s command? Things, most certainly, could have been different.
     Then again, I’d be out one PlayStation.

Yes, the procedure went fine on Tuesday.

My throat’s feeling a little bruised, but they told me to resume normal eating habits within twenty-four hours, including imbibing. They didn’t find the stricture they were looking for, but they did find out that my throat is uh. . .

. . .ribbed with esophageal webs.

Yeah.

Today’s headline article of the Post just verifies what a lot of us have thought all along–the United States is going to do whatever we damn well want, no matter what the UN says.

Leadership by example.

Reading the Preamble of the UN Charter:

WE THE PEOPLES OF THE UNITED NATIONS DETERMINED
to save succeeding generations from the scourge of war, which twice in our lifetime has brought untold sorrow to mankind, and to reaffirm faith in fundamental human rights, in the dignity and worth of the human person, in the equal rights of men and women and of nations large and small, and to establish conditions under which justice and respect for the obligations arising from treaties and other sources of international law can be maintained, and to promote social progress and better standards of life in larger freedom,

AND FOR THESE ENDS
to practice tolerance and live together in peace with one another as good neighbours, and to unite our strength to maintain international peace and security, and to ensure, by the acceptance of principles and the institution of methods, that armed force shall not be used, save in the common interest, and to employ international machinery for the promotion of the economic and social advancement of all peoples,

HAVE RESOLVED TO COMBINE OUR EFFORTS TO ACCOMPLISH THESE AIMS
Accordingly, our respective Governments, through representatives assembled in the city of San Francisco, who have exhibited their full powers found to be in good and due form, have agreed to the present Charter of the United Nations and do hereby establish an international organization to be known as the United Nations.

I understand it’s a different world than when the UN was established in 1945.

But maybe all those other nations are looking at the situation with eyes unclouded.

I know we, as a nation have to protect our interests. I want terrorists captured and brought to justice. I desire, more than anything else, the United States before 9/11. When we worried about things like Britney and Survivor and chads. When we felt safe.

I just don’t feel any safer knowing we’re going to Iraq without the support of the rest of the world. Are we going to be any safer without allies?