Monthly Archives: April 2003

Cold

     It was cold that day.
     “I didn’t mean for this to happen.” Her breath took shape in the cold winter air as she spoke. “I’m sorry.”
     Before, he forgave.
     Before, she promised.
     That was then, when he believed that they could work everything out. Now, now was different. She was different. She had made a decision.
     “I’m,” She paused and bit her lip, a sign of stress that he recognized. “Leaving.” She brushed hair away from her face with a mittened hand. The orange coat was closed close around her, buttoned up to her neck.
     He berated himself for falling in love with her. He berated himself for falling in love with her so much. He looked at her. He closed his eyes, remembered to breathe, opened them again. He kept his hands in his pockets. For the first time in his entire life, the thought of striking a woman appeared and was dismissed.
     She shivered.
     He knew she was cold, and he did not care. He didn’t say anything. Gloved hands in pockets stretched, tried to keep warm and failed. He was cold throughout, but he didn’t care about that, either. He knew that even when he went back indoors, he’d remain cold. He looked away. The last leaves swirled around the empty playground, and he watched them create circular patterns around their feet. How cliché, he thought.
     “I’m moving to California.”
     He looked up. “California?” With him, he added to himself.
     “Yes.” There was an almost imperceptible nod, something he knew as distinctly, utterly, “her.”
     He thought about an appropriate response but couldn’t think of one. He picked anything. “I wish the two of you the best of luck.” He turned and started to walk.
     “Wait.” She said.
     He turned. He saw her hand reaching out to him, her taking a tentative step forward. He shook his head, “No.”
     “Just,” He took a deep breath, exhaled. “Go.” He turned and started walking. He didn’t have a destination in mind. He just wanted to walk.
     She didn’t follow.
     Everything’s a cliché, he thought. Until it happens to you.

     He walked to the grocery store, to the drug store, to work, and to the metro station. When he came back, she was gone. He went inside, sat on the couch for a few moments. He took off his gloves, felt the warmth slowly creep into his hands. He looked at the thermostat.
     The heat was on full blast. She was always cold.
     He stood up and turned the dial down to sixty-five. He could wear a sweater.

Yeah, I know.

It’s early. But I took a nap earlier and I decided, “Hey. Why not do laundry?”

My fling with Claritin

At first, I could only see you with a note from my doctor. Then, a couple of days ago, we met in the drugstore, and before I knew it, we were together.

Being with you promised happiness, freedom, adventure. I was done with being miserable and feeling sorry for myself.

How little I knew then. Now I know that past your pretty packaging, past your sweetness, there’s nothing that you have that I want.

Which is why we have to part ways. We’re just not working out. I guess there’s no chemistry, but you don’t do anything for me. It’s hard for me to say, but I can’t lie to you about us. I wish things were different. I have tried and I have tried, but I feel that I’m doing all the work. I wish that we had some common ground that we could reach–but the last 48 hours of my life have been a living hell.

And you didn’t help. Not one bit.

Claritin (Loratadine 10mg), please don’t take it personally. It’s not you–it’s me. I feel like I just need something different.

I wish you the best of luck, and take care.

Allergies suck. What’s worse is that this Claritin stuff does nothing for me. And now I can’t take anything that I know works for me for 24 hours. Did I just get the sugar pill packet placebo by mistake?

Update: Researching Allegra instead, I decided to read the possible list of side effects. Of particular interest are the side effects at the 30mg dosage, and the 60mg dosage.

Side effects with Allegra 30 mg are low and may include headache, cold, coughing, or accidental injury.
Side effects with Allegra 60 mg for seasonal allergies are low; less than 3% of people experience cold or flu, nausea, menstrual pain, or drowsiness.

Accidental injury? I can imagine the drug trials.

Researcher #1: “Whoa! That’s the third piano that fell from the sky this week!”
Researcher #2: “Hrm. That one didn’t hit any of the sugar pill users. Better make a note of that in the list of possible side effects.”

And then, of course, there’s the whole menstrual pain thing. I understand that it affects less than 3%, but I’m not sure I want to experience menstrual pain, seeing as how I’ve avoided it all these years by not having a uterus.

It's maaaaaaaagic.

Current microdrives top out at 1GB. Hitachi’s talking about using a new technology that will allow them to squeeze even more storage capacity into the already tiny devices. 4GB, to be exact.

How?

With Pixie Dust of course.

Happy Tax Day

Sent that money out yesterday. Overall, I came out on top by a little bit of money. Not enough to buy myself say, a 12″ G4 Powerbook with SuperDrive, but nice enough to pay for most of my rent. Which is a nice, albeit smaller, financial break.