I have learned that you cannot, in fact, walk into an apple store, slap a thousand dollars on one of their fine wooden tables, and preorder an iPad.
They will, in a professional manner and with utmost courtesy, direct you to the website, where preorders closed two days ago.
They will then recommended that you stop by the store on the 16th, launch day, with your cash in hand.
Which doesn’t seem like a recommendation so much as an, “I dare you to.”