Lots of Monkeys

I mean, on the one hand, I really like Bruce Campbell.

On the other hand, it would be an Ash vs. Freddy vs. Jason movie.

I’m a big fan of crossovers, and apparently so are the numerous people that enjoyed the Batman: Dead End fan film. Hell, at one point in college, I fancied the idea of a Highlander / Gargoyles: The Animated Series crossover and even outlined a fanfic. I stopped after I realized that I’d be writing fanfic. Segue to:

Real Conversation
SCENE: A restaurant across the street from the anime convention. I’m seated next to IvyDraken and HazyDestiny, along with others from the convention. The restaurant is filled with people wearing con badges.

Me: So, what are you guys doing here at the convention, I don’t really recognize it as your, “scene.”
IvyDraken: Well. . .
HazyDestiny: We write fanfic!

I look at IvyDraken accusingly. She’s glaring at HazyDestiny
Me: It’s not slash*, is it?

At the mention of slash, people at other tables turn their heads. IvyDraken puts her hand on her forehead and averts her eyes.
Me: It’s not. . . Power Rangers slash, is it?!

IvyDraken covers her face with both hands and hides under the table. People at other tables are staring, their jaws agape.
Me: OH. MY. GOD.

At this point, I’m standing and pointing at IvyDraken.

HazyDestiny hands me a sheaf of paper, “Here’s chapter 5!”

IvyDraken’s voice squeaks out from under the table, “It’s only the Red and Green rangers! They’re the only ones that are good together!”

*: Slash the short definition: “fanfiction written about romantic or sexual relationships occurring between two same-gender characters, usually male. The characters used in the fiction are denoted by X/Y, where X and Y are the characters’ initials or names.”

So. Let’s say that there’s a friend of yours. You know that they need to be picked up from the airport some time in the relatively near future. You say, “Sure,” you could do that, just let me know when.

You don’t hear from them for a while. So, on a whim, you call them one morning, just to check if they need that ride.

Turns out they’re coming in that day at around 3 in the afternoon.

So you say, “Sorry,” and explain that of course, you needed a little more warning. I mean, you work for a living, and getting that time off without any prior warning is going to be tricky. And you don’t go pick them up and they’re left to find another ride. You hang up, you go back to work and don’t give it another thought. I mean, this is what people do, they say, “No” all the time and nobody thinks badly of either side. Situation’s over and done with. There’s no drama.

Except it’s not your friend.

It’s a parent.

And of course, you say, “Sure,” and talk to your boss, get the time off and get ready to pick them up from the airport at 3.

Because it’s your parents.

So, I checked out the Express, the washington post’s new tabloid format that they give away for free during the metro rush. It’s not bad. All the news that you can read on your morning commute without taking up all that additional space.

I like the fact that I can get a free crossword every day now.

How good are your moshing skills?

Find out.

How is it possible that coffeehouses are always full? Even on your day off at 10:30 in the morning.

I mean, don’t these people have work? Classes? Something?

Since I had to drop off the car in Bethesda to get some service done, I decided to live the life of the idle rich for half a day. Here goes:

9:30
Dropped off the car.

10:00
Found Xando/COSI convenient to dealership.

10:05
Ordered tall double oh arctic mocha single shot half caf frappamadoozle. . . drink. . . thing.

10:07
New manager hands me my drink, sans lid.

The manager is new, I can tell. He calls it a “small.” Behind him, baristas roll their eyes and wink knowingly my direction while they silently mouth the word “tall.” One of them grabs the proper size lid and caps off my coffee drink.

10:12
While making journal entries, I notice that there are lots of good looking women in Bethesda.

10:33
Lots of them.

12:00
Lunchtime, so I visit the small sushi shop on St. Elmo Avenue.

1:44
I visit Big Planet Comics, which is understandably empty. I guess the target audience is working in the tech industry or still at school.

2:38
Hit Pearl Art and Craft. Pick up a new journal (spiral bound, hard covers) and art pens.

3:00 – 5:30
Boredom strikes. I hit the Barnes & Noble and read WIRED, iWorld, a few video game magazines, 2600. I run out of magazines to read at 5:34

5:35
They call to tell me the car’s ready for pickup–which is another nightmare altogether.

Short story: Car’s still not fixed.

I got pretty bored at one point. Rick says that this is why the idle rich have yachts.