The (Food)Stuff of Nightmares

Here’s a little story about a girl who we will call, “Mina.” Now, this story has nothing to do with real life, I can’t tell you that enough, so without further filler at this point, I’m going to start my story.

Mina enjoyed cigarettes, and one day, while she was having a cigarette break, a capricious, although very handsome imp decided to mix a bit of her food together. You see, this was at dinner, and his food had not arrived yet. He moved some grits there, and some corned hash around, mixing them together into what he called, “Grash.” Now, the imp never really told anyone that he called it, “Grash,” as this was all in his head. After a while, he got bored and went back to waiting for his food.

Then, the boy-Mina-was-not-dating saw what the imp did and told him that he just did something that Mina really hates.

“You just did something that Mina really hates.” He said, fiddling with his Treo.

The imp was confused. Surely, food touching other food wasn’t that bad after all! It mixes together when you eat it anyway. So he asked the boy-Mina-was-not-dating a simple question.

“What does she really hate?” He asked.

“Oh, her food touching her other food.” He cursed at his Treo. “Drives her crazy.”

Just then, Mina walked back to the table and the imp watched with amusement. She sat down and put her purse away.

Then she looked at her food.

She said something unintelligible and then picked up a fork and knife with haste. Mina began to separate the grits from the hash. Tiny bits of bleached corn were separated with care from bits of corned beef. As the imp watched, he felt an urgency, almost a need in the way she separated the food.

Delighted with his discovery, the imp proceeded to take his fork and mix all of Mina’s food together on her plate.

Mina looked at the imp, powerless to stop his fork from mixing her food together and exclaimed, “Stop! I’m going to have nightmares!”

The imp, suddenly struck with the power of her words, then put down his fork and simply asked her one question.

“WHAT THE HELL KIND OF NIGHTMARES DO YOU HAVE?!”

MinaNightMare.JPGOnce again, this is not based in fact, it’s just a story. On the other hand, I posed for this picture with Min—er, Nina, after dinner.